By Billie Piper has spoken about needing to fall apart in her 'reckless 20s' after becoming famous so young, in an exclusive interview for our April 2021 issue (on sale now).
The singer, actor, screen-writer and now director of new film Rare Beasts shot to fame as a teenager blowing bubble gum in a now-famous 1990s TV ad for teen magazine Smash Hits.
Hit singles followed – including the feelgood power anthem Because We Want To – which gave Piper her first UK number one. At the age of just 14 she was living alone in a flat in London to pursue a career in music. By 18 she was married to her first husband, TV and radio presenter Chris Evans who was then 35.
Piper, now 38, told Red she wasn't frightened about leaving home so young back then ('I loved it') although 'now I feel so sorry for my 14-year-old self, but I remember at the time really enjoying that freedom'.
She was also raw and unfiltered about how her teenage experiences have impacted her in later life, especially when it comes to relationships. She divorced Evans at 21, married actor Laurence Fox at the age of 24 (they have two sons together, Winston and Eugene) and is now in a relationship with musician Johnny Lloyd, with whom she shares 2-year-old daughter Tallulah.
Piper said: 'I think a lot of my issues romantically have come from being on my own a lot when I was very young. So it’s sort of an extreme desire to feel loved and safe. I guess on some level it’s like abandonment issues – even though I wasn’t particularly abandoned; I lead myself largely – but I think that has affected relationships. I’ve [since] learned about attachment issues and co-dependency, which I never saw as a problem, until I did that work on myself.'
The mum-of-three has also spoken candidly before about her teenage struggles with an eating disorder and contemplating suicide at 16. She told Red that, on reflection, she's 'alive to the fact that it could have gone one of two ways, and almost did for a short time'.
She added: 'I'm only coming to terms with that period of my life right now. I think it's done its fair share of damage, but I'm also very grateful for that period, because it set me up for doing what I'm doing now.'
Piper admits that the decade that followed was intense for her: 'My 20s were quite wild, and that was likely to be a reaction to [teenage years spent] working all the hours that God sent, being very performative and treated sort of like a flashy sales girl; a really young one.
'I really needed to fall apart in that sort of reckless 20s way. To not care about looking put-together every waking moment of my life or saying the wrong things as a role model to children.'
She has since established herself as one of Britain's best actors and screenwriters, starring in Doctor Who, Diary of a Call Girl and 2020's I Hate Suzie, which she co-created with her close friend Lucy Prebble. Next up is Rare Beasts, the fierce anti rom-com about a career driven single mother, which she wrote and directed (out 21st May).
She says she wrote the film seven years ago in response to the immense pressure surrounding her early 30s.
'Something I saw happening was women struggling under the "have-it-all" culture, which I think is quite an unhelpful message. I saw peers and read about women having ambitions, having children, navigating relationships, navigating modern feminism, and it all culminating in a bit of a mental health crisis. It was filling my ears and my mind and spirit.'
You can read the full interview with Billie Piper in Red's April 2021 issue, on sale now. Subscribe to Red now to get the magazine delivered to your door.
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